Celestial Navigation

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Celestial Navigation at a Glance
Sage Ocean
Last Captain Gutsup
Senior Officer(s) Wittywench
Politics Autocratic
Shares Even
Flag Affiliation none
Founded 17 March, 2008
dormant as of 21 May, 2009
Crews-Celestial Navigation.jpg

Celestial Navigation is a crew on the Sage Ocean.

Founding Members

Captain Gutsup is a keen explorer of, uh, all things. Known ocean-wide for his romances with the ladies, all he wants is a kind, patient woman to sit back and feed the kids so he can pillage the seas for gold pieces, KB and mistresses. You can't be pushy with him. He has a heart of gold and shares everything he can with the crew, and you should, too.

Wittywench is as her name describes. Never to judge a book by it's cover, is something pirates have passed down from generation to generation, and Witty will be the first one to tell you, honestly, how it is. She's sweet, kind and a little bit dirty - what more could you ask for? You can't make an enemy in the crew wench unless you're a really ignorant barrelstopper.

Countess is senior officer and scribe, improper grammar isn't safe around her, but she won't make your life hell if you can't spell things out how they should be spelled out. In her free time, Countess likes to write, draw and learn to do everything to the best of her ability - which, believe me, mateys, is a really high one.

Chuckly The Great, what can be said about Chuck? If you like pink and like the Spice Tarts, you can find some keen conversation in the flamboyant, beautiful being he is. You don't have to do a lot to get along with Chuck. Have a great sense of humor, maybe? Chuckly's favorite food is the Beefstick and if you ask nicely, he'll share.

Portiaa is the self-proclaimed strategist, she has a mind unparalleled to none - maybe Einstein - and digs nothing more than owning, kicking booty and taking names. She's not as easy to get along with as the rest of the crew, and generally, if you hit on her at the docks, she'll raise her eyebrow and stick her signature Rapier in your abdomen, but otherwise? Eh, rip 'em up.

Public Statement

Celestial Navigation, for a rookie crew, has gotten off to a flying start. Banded by five experienced pirates that bonded over rum, spades and tarts in early February, we've yet to find a member of the Sage ocean that hasn't been able to shrink-fit into our lack-of-standards. At Celebrated fame in just over a week, we plan to pillage and bond, like crews should.

You see many crews saying that all they aim for is to have fun, when we actually do. Between it's founding members, there's a lot of history and a lot of knowledge over what's right to do, wrong to do, and what is the key to not only having a successful pirate - but actually enjoying being one.

So, we actually do have fun. We play cards, we roll hemp, we sail the eight seas for booty of every variety. We swallow, we spit, we throw lewd comments out into the wind, we even have Chuckly in our overbearing arms, and kids? That's a heavy responsibility for a few daft land lubbers to handle, when drunk.

We don't ask much of you. Actually, we don't ask a lot at all, and what's a pirate if s/he sticks to the rules?

The answer is A Good One.

Rules Of Attraction

1. Promotion pays, but you won't get the chance if the first thing you ask us when joining is, "may I be officer?" If you have the stats, yes. If not, we'll watch you and we'll help you until you fit the standards, and once you do - yes, you may. And you may reel in as much PoE as your pockets can take. And, hey, if you don't have any pockets, check out Wittywench's Tailoring Stall on Scrimshaw Island for the best prices from the wittiest wench.

You didn't see that coming?

2. Cabin person's will be promoted to Pirate under the grounds of their Sailing, Carpentry, Bilging and Gunning stats. It's an old school rule that hasn't been seen, at least by us, in a while. Pirates can gun without permission, and on a pillage if the guns are taken up by somebody that can't manage and uphold them efficiently, we will lose.

Leading us to the next point.

3. When on a pillage, find out who's in charge and if you have any questions, please ask them orderly. Because personally, I think I speak for every Officer on every ocean that whining to be gunner when there is one already is annoying, and no you can't be. Sail, carp, bilge. Every single puzzle is a major part of running one successfully, and so we need everybody on their best stations. Joke around in chat, all you like, but whine and I'll cut ye.*

*I: Portiaa, all complaints and bludgeons to the face to be directed her way.

4. Have your wits about you. Every single kind. Be funny, but don't stress yourself. There's already one Dane Cook in the world, and if there's one on the ocean? You should've chosen Sarahsilverman instead. Just have fun, laugh, relax, flirt on Countess and trash-talk your monitor/notebook until we grabble those bitc...hoppy, cute, fuzzy fluffy bunnies.

Remember, guys. It's your choice who you're with, but it's also your choice to miss out on the time of your lives.

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