User:Lulunz/Sante's Collected Works

Since Sante is becoming rather prolific, I wanted to put all her work in one place in case I want it again later...

=Poetry death match 2005=

Registration Round: Clerihew

 * That great ringer Artemis
 * Is almost free of artifice
 * decent show of pretence
 * Will cost just fifty cents

Round 1: Haiku

 * Red tide at sunset.
 * Fish leap cool and golden from
 * Toxic crimson seas.

Round 2: Limericks

 * A salt from the Isle of Kent
 * Lived twenty-six years in a tent
 * He said "It's not silly:
 * Although it gets chilly,
 * Just think what I've saved on the rent."

Round 3: Cinquains

 * Moonshine,
 * Crystalline, smooth,
 * Bubbles away above.
 * Darkness recedes, clarity lifts:
 * Spirit.

Round 4: Acrostics

 * All hail the Queen of waves and tide:
 * Mistress of seals and octopi,
 * Poseidon took thee for his bride,
 * Halosydne, our sea-born queen.
 * In seaweed green ye rule Descartes,
 * Thy island home 'neath azure sky.
 * Residing in the ocean's heart,
 * Illustrious in rags of green,
 * Though wide the sea, we hear thee sigh,
 * Encircling still the deep marine.

Round 5: Terza Rima
Pirate Courting


 * Green islands, perfect, fringed with golden sands
 * Sit still, unmoved beneath an endless sun;
 * Amid their sapphire seas these nightless lands


 * Are innocent of violence every one.
 * And yet what jealousy each isle inspires,
 * How many wars have these sweet shores begun?


 * Each flag to win more island hearts aspires;
 * Results depend on finely honed romance -
 * An invitation is what form requires:


 * Say, wont you come and meet me in a dance
 * Of squares? No jig, instead the sea quadrille:
 * A cannon clap, a pause, then both advance.


 * Now demonstrate to all your grace and skill,
 * Anticipate each step and match it well,
 * For if ye trip there's more than blood to spill.


 * Through tears, of how her love was lost ye'll tell,
 * Your moves outclassed upon that wat'ry floor.
 * But warn your rival, though your banner fell,


 * That fickle island heart he can't secure:
 * Beware, for all is fair in love and war.

Round 6: Rondeau

 * Sod it, lost again at Spades,
 * As bad as Hearts: each loss parades
 * My lack of skill. Though not a bragger,
 * I resent my rival's swagger.
 * P'r'aps I'll try my luck with blades...


 * I've practised lots at different grades,
 * And in some mad crew escapades,
 * And bought a shiny new skull dagger -
 * Sod it, lost again.


 * Time to drink! The rum pervades
 * Me, leaves me wide to slick charades
 * From some green upstart carpetbagger.
 * No stake left so home I stagger.
 * Left or right? Now drunk tirades:
 * Sod it, lost again!

Round 7: 3P - Piratey Poetry Parody
Too long to post here right now I think, but here's the link

=Plundered Poems, Sonnet Edition=

Blood Diamonds


 * A kraken, bled, sheds livid diamond tears
 * Condens'ed sun-caught spume, made black within
 * By cannon-shot, and well-chewed salts. Each fears
 * His marrow becomes jewels should he not win.


 * A skeleton counts souls to fray committed,
 * Recalls his days of flesh. In life he never
 * Contemplated shadow days. He fitted
 * Type, sank shooters, brawled in doubloon fever.


 * Dear crewmates, flagmates, loyal hearties true
 * Consider not if blood or bones be better,
 * Find other ends: like steel honed anew,
 * Shed thy dullness, strive for something greater.


 * If thou would dust at end of days content,
 * Make diamonds now of every second spent.

=Limericks=

What do you want on your tombstone competition

 * Sante, poet,
 * Now plays the harp:
 * Her pen was mighty,
 * But swords are sharp.

December Doodles (winning) Limerick

 * On Cobalt I joined Captain Trout -
 * No greenie's been seen more devout:
 * "Till death I will serve her",
 * I swore with true fervour -
 * But then my free trial ran out.

Limerick Limerick Limerick Limerick Limerick!
A poetic competition of Fives (non-entry 'cos no inspiration till after deadline. Sigh)


 * I intended to train for five years
 * To join all you brave buccaneers
 * I'd be awesome, and fearsome,
 * Adventuresome, fusome -
 * Not flotsam and jetsam, in tears...


 * I began with five hours blockading
 * Some island some flag was invading
 * I sank five times sound;
 * Lost a limb in each round -
 * My heads all that's left, it's degrading!


 * I next spent five minutes distilling,
 * The "blechs" of the salt were spine-chilling
 * All the black and the brown
 * Got sent up and not down
 * And instead of fine rum I made swilling.


 * On the docks I stayed only five seconds -
 * Here a fight, there a trade invite beckons:
 * I've got more bandanas
 * Than chimps have bananas
 * Or Nepal has mandalas, I reckons.


 * If I had all of five lives, not one,
 * I'd still never learn how to gun,
 * My carpenting's rotten,
 * The bilge best forgotten:
 * All my dreams (like my rig) are undone.

Regarding officer chat colour

 * Said some officers all in a stew,
 * "We won't beg, that's not what pirates do.
 * We tell it succinct:
 * Make our chat shades distinct,
 * Or we'll make ye all black and blue too."

Limerick Wars...

 * I'm late to this game it is true -
 * I've been saving my barbs up for Dru.
 * Although she is faster,
 * Of wit I'm the master,
 * And sure to make mayhem ensue.


 * My name is lulunz
 * That's my name, that's what the men said.
 * Or perhaps it's lulunz?
 * No: I stick to my guns,
 * And fill my opponents with lead.


 * Young Matthias, your lines really smell;
 * And you can't get your rhythm to gel.
 * More mistaken ye be:
 * I'm a she not a he,
 * But perhaps ye don't know how to tell?


 * Now here's one more rhyme for you hoons,
 * From the queen of the lim'rick, lulunz.
 * When your names are forgotten,
 * (Your poems were rotten),
 * Her fame will endure many moons.


 * Dear Fronny, on much we agree,
 * But ye cannot fault my poetry:
 * When saying Matthias
 * I rhyme it with Prius
 * And put the main stress on the "i".


 * I take my hat off to Drusilla,
 * Who rhymes with most consummate skill-a -
 * But don't smile in haste
 * For someone's replaced
 * Yer toothpaste with wet polyfilla.


 * Yer attacks, ye young blaggard Sharrac,
 * Fall flat - ye'r a talentless hack.
 * Here's a way to ensure
 * You stink less and sting more:
 * Try waxing yer back, crack and sac!


 * In light of your friendly derision
 * I propose a less vulgar revision:
 * If the tackle ye lack,
 * Then just wax yer back:
 * Less vulgar, but lacking incision.


 * In the future I'll show some decorum
 * For the delicate ears of this forum,
 * Though who would guess pirates
 * Would blush over privates -
 * With such low blows p'raps we should insure 'em?


 * Me hearties, and smart Looterati
 * For a while I must part from this party:
 * Instead of hard working
 * I find I've been shirking,
 * Inventing more lim'rick karate.

Before we moved to Sage

 * The Lost Lot, a crew on Viridian
 * For their crew colours picked out obsidian
 * They said "Red, blue and green
 * Are too commonly seen;
 * We want something more rare we'll look pretty in."

When Tealbeard was captain

 * Our captain with beard coloured Teal
 * Bought a brig that smelled strongly of eel.
 * He said "it's so rank
 * That my crew runs the plank
 * But for only 8 eight doubs it's a steal!"

From the Clothing Suggestions thread

 * There once was a pirate named Cleaver
 * Who caught a mysterious fever:
 * In a swoon he approved
 * High-heeled shoes and tattoos,
 * Bare chests - and a cloak lined with beaver.

For Helystra

 * Beware of the fierce Queen Helystra,
 * She'd slit yer as quick as she'd kiss yer!
 * Hold yer tongue while swordfighting
 * Or taste her steel biting
 * And wince all yer days from sequestra.

For Timberillo

 * A dock tart once asked Timberillo,
 * "Care to join in a quick pecadillo?"
 * But she was dismayed:
 * His cigar, when displayed,
 * Was only a limp cigarillo.

=Blockade intents=

Go With the Flow's Intent to take Admiral Island

 * Abandon hope all ye pirate throng
 * Declaration is hereby announced to all who
 * Might have idly dreamed of Admiral. Now
 * In readiness for Admiral I,
 * Read this, and know our intent :
 * Awar chest will be dropped forthwith
 * Let foolhardy souls attempt
 * I n vain to resist, and taste our wrath.
 * Stand up now any brave
 * Or foolish soul, who considers themself
 * Up to this task, this fateful duel.
 * Rest well, for yell sink on our salvo:
 * Shodan says Admiral will go with the flow.