Art:Space Pirates/Lucy's Story

= Lucy's Story =

The Misadventures of Pirate Swift: An Autobiography (Part the Second)
by Jollylady

“But this has been my dream ever since my parents ruined my life!” I pounded my fists into the wooden bar, echoing the complaint to Ratri for what must have been the tenth time that week.

“Quit making a mess of my bar, Lucy!” grimaced Ratri as she wiped away the green residue my fists left. “Now which time was that? When you became a ghost? Or was it when you first came howling into this world?” She continued wiping down the bar while keeping a firm eye on the various travelers settled in the dark room. I sighed and ventured a glance myself. All I noticed was a red-headed young guy, half-asleep; a man in uniform, just entering the bar; and an older scientist-type, nose in a book. None was worthy of a second look. I knew Ratri was teasing me, but I didn’t care.

I rolled my eyes. “As if you didn’t ever have parents you hated,” I retorted. Ratri’s face turned dark. Best to stick to the subject, I decided. “What do you mean, I won’t be able to find the—”

“Hush, girl,” Ratri hissed at me. She moved closer to my stool and whispered, “Do ye see the insignia on that uniform over there?”

I peeked at the blonde man, but shook my head. Ratri explained under her breath. “That’s Edny Pachenga of the Intergalactic Trade Federation. The ITF!” She went back to her work, one eye on this Pachenga fellow, and one eye on me.

I’d met Ratri one month prior when I arrived at Calliope. It wasn’t the nicest station I’d ever been to, but it was just sketchy enough to suit my mood. And it’s not like I was in any danger—I was already dead. I’d had plenty of time to adjust over the last year, and I’d come to appreciate the benefits of ghostly existence. Nothing quite beat the initial look of shock when you met someone for the first time. (My first night here, a freaky looking green alien tried to attack me with his tail, screaming “T’ahar Do’y Nir’kin!” as he jumped through the air. Needless to say, he couldn’t hurt me, but it was quite the introduction. Ratri, who’d witnessed the whole thing, couldn’t stop laughing for a week. Whenever Delinvir slithered up to the bar, she ribbed him for trying to send a ghost to his “beloved afterworld”.)

Ratri herself quickly became a steadfast companion, somehow never asking what brought me to her unattractive corner of the universe. Sometimes I’d catch her giving me knowing looks that reminded me suspiciously of my mother, but she never asked anything outright, and I never volunteered, either. She had flipped out the day she realized I’d discovered her secret—that she traded intel with the various low-lifes (and high-lifes) who frequented her bar—but I vowed secrecy in exchange for her help in finding Oliver’s Folly. The Folly, captained by dreaded space pirates of matchless notoriety: Delphinus, survivor of the selective breeding grounds on Janus Minor; Gorgeia, the polyped pirate colony; Mulligan, chief navigator; Prasti Centra, the mysterious mechanic. The Folly, my dream since age 10.

Truth be told, at this point, I would settle for any old ship looking for adventure and the downfall of the ITF. I’d been searching, even begging, for a spot for too long, with no success. It had been surprisingly easy to slip aboard a passenger ship in the mayhem after the explosion that ended my life one year prior, and it had seemed the perfect opportunity: finally I could escape the parentals AND follow the family tradition. What could possibly go wrong? I’d thought to myself. I’m quick, smart, and determined! I hadn’t counted on the ghostliness presenting a problem, though:

“A ghost couldn’t possibly be a pirate. They’d see us coming for miles! Har, Har! Sorry, kid.” Har, har? I fumed. You have no idea what you just gave up, you losers! It was safer to keep these thoughts to myself but it was nearly impossible not to respond. Even the robots thwarted me:

“Please remove your ecto-being from this cabin. Please remove your ecto-being from this cabin. Please remove…”

There’s only so much rejection you can take, but every failure made me more determined. If I could just plead my case before the Folly crew, I knew my space pirate career would take off! Those pirates wouldn’t give a darn if they had a ghost aboard. In fact, they’d—

A clinking of glass awoke me from my reverie. ITF man stood up and slunk off to his quarters. Probably wanted to go play Space Invaders 3045 or something. As I watched him leave, I realized that this dumpy-looking man was the reason my life was over (again): the Folly would never dare to dock at Calliope while ITF man remained. Even pirates of great renown needed to step carefully around the ITF, given the current political situation. There was no guarantee that he’d leaving anytime soon—he could very well be here till the next cycle. Once again, the whole stupid world was getting in between me and my dreams.

I felt Ratri’s eyes on me as I watched the sliding doors whoosh shut behind Pachenga, but when I turned to face her, she just shrugged and went back to her work.

Two weeks later, my fears had come true. Nothing had changed.

Oh sure, we’d had visitors, but only those with an official capacity. One navy vessel stayed a whole week. The dwarf was a riot, but I didn’t like his captain. The short man had been describing the latest antics of some smuggler who called himself “Two-Eyed Jax” the last night before they left: “So he’s got two working eyeballs, even though one’s made of metal, but the man wears a patch! Who does he think he is? Old Blackbeard? Har!” Ratri and I couldn’t help but laugh, but his captain slammed down his glass and stalked out of the room in a huff.

“Geeze, touchy!” I snickered after he’d left. The dwarf laughed, and when we parted the next day, I almost wished I could invite him to visit the old Mars X Space Station. Until I remembered that it was gone. And I’d hated it anyway.

Navy ships were plentiful, but I didn’t want to join the navy. Only two things remained constant: my unsuccessful attempts to locate the Folly, and Pachenga’s unsuccessful attempts to ban me from the bar. Though Ratri couldn’t help with the first, she convinced Pachenga that it was quite acceptable for a ghost to hang around the bar, even if the ghost only appeared to be thirteen.

So I sat in the empty bar, miserable, one afternoon. Sure that I’d never find the Folly, I was disappointed, confused, and even lonely. I found myself wondering about my parents, and where they might be. How did I get here? I wondered. ''Is this really what I wanted? Who am I now, anyway?'' And Ratri didn’t even take my suffering seriously. All day she’d made wisecracks about “human adolescence” and how she “hadn’t expected ghosts would get as angsty as humans did during this phase”.

I didn’t even look up when I heard the doors slide open to admit a traveler. If it wasn’t one of my pirate heroes, I didn’t want to care. Before long, though, my curiosity got the better of me, and my eyes slid toward the stranger. Suddenly, I could almost feel my heart quicken—armor-plated combat boots? Trench coat? Was that a laserkatana? As the man sat down not ten feet away, and placed his Fender laser guitar carelessly on the ground, I nearly died. Again.

I had, at one time, served as Vice President of the Matt Black Intergalactic Fan Club, and I could recognize him anywhere. In fact, I had run his Virtual Fan World network, and modded several live chats with him. He’d praised my thoughtful questions, and had even recommended that I lead the group, instead of that spoiled Esmerelda whose father financed the whole thing. Of course when Esme (or YesME, as I liked to call her) heard about Matt’s comments, she punished me by booting me from the MBIFC. She punished Matt by spreading rumors about his ninjahood, and his father’s cowardice at the hands of pirates. I found out about YesME’s betrayal on the very morning my father returned from that trip abroad. I didn’t know that my mother’s key would open the strange chest he’d brought home. I was so angry at YesME, Dad’s Rules for Galactic Artifacts slipped out of my mind. I just jammed the key inside the chest and the whole world went white. Next thing I knew, I was a ghost, floating a mile above Mars. No one else was in sight, but I knew the parentals would both be furious. So I slipped aboard a ship and went rogue. I had decided to forget about YesME and everything else (even Matt Black) after the explosion, in order to focus on my new career in space piracy. Until now.

I was suddenly faced with the biggest decision of all time. Did I dare approach him? Certainly, he only knew me as Scallywag, my Mod handle. He wouldn’t recognize me as Lucy Swift. Would he? And if I sat there silently, if I didn’t at least say hello, could I ever forgive myself? Ever since his first hit “Can Ye Navigate?” I’d been a huge fan:

I’d rock ye to the closest galaxy,

If only ye could navigate for me;

Baby, yer love is worse than a black hole,

Maybe when yer near me, you can save my soul…

''Can ye navigate? Better board before too late!''

''Can ye load the guns? Maybe baby yer the one, YEAH!''

Could I really let this opportunity pass me by? I was still sitting there, wallowing in indecision, when Ratri returned from the loo. If she cared that the Matt Black was seated at her bar, it didn’t seem to faze her.

She flipped over a glass and began pouring. She gave Matt a once-over, glanced at me, and grinned. “So, my Folly seekers, in the same room at the same time! Har!”

Matt lifted his head and noticed me for the first time.

“You after the Folly, too, kid?” Not one hint of recognition passed across his face.

“Y-y-yes,” I responded.

“You think they’ll take on a ghost?” he asked.

“Well…I hope so…there’s nowhere else for me to go, anyway,” I responded.

He looked at me, then back at Ratri. “Well,” he said slowly. “Well,” he repeated. I began to worry that was all he knew how to say unless he was singing one of his rock songs. He glanced at Ratri before settling his gaze on me. “Well. That’s good enough for me. I guess we’ve both just found what we needed, kid. You need a ship. I need a companion. We leave tomorrow at 18:00. Best get packing.” He paused again, and then added, “What’s your name?”

I couldn’t help myself. I pummeled the air with my fist. I was going to find the Folly! At last! I thought. “Me name’s Lucy, Lucy Swift!” I yelled.

Matt Black finished his space beer, chuckled, and said, “See ye tomorrow, pirate Swift.” With that, he stood, took up his guitar, and headed for the door.

Ratri, gave me one of her looks and followed him. Too excited to care, I went straight to my room. I had always liked the way “Pirate Swift” sounded, but hearing it from Matt Black left me speechless.

Some time later, Ratri came by with the whole story. Apparently Matt had found the Folly, but she’d fallen on hard times. When he asked to join, they’d given permission—if he brought two recruits along, too. Matt, who’d been traveling with some motley alien, had pleaded for immediate acceptance; he begged, offered music lessons, to no avail. Thus he found himself upon Calliope.

“But why does Matt Black need to be a pirate?” I wondered. “And why did he come here, out of all the places he could’ve visited? No offense, Ratri…”

Ratri grinned. “Well, Lucy, all I can say is—that’s between the man and his bartender,” she replied, eyes twinkling.

“You…you knew! You got him to come here! Oh Ratri, you’re the best!” I slid over and gave her a hug, goop and all.

Her yell was still ringing in my ears the next day, when I boarded Matt’s ship, ready to start my pirate career in earnest. I imagined the flight would be quick and uneventful, that after a quick jump through hyperspace, I’d finally be aboard the Folly, making friends with the pirates who’d be the family I’d always dreamed of, and that everything would work out exactly according to plan.

Unfortunately, as was happening too often, things didn’t work out quite the way I’d envisioned. Looking back, I guess I should’ve noticed that it had all worked out a little too easily. I didn’t know if I could ever forgive Matt Black, but I definitely added him to my “Scourges of the Universe” list, right up there with Dad and YesME. We’d made a quick jump through hyperspace, but before I realized what was going on, we’d landed. Landed? I thought. ''Weren’t we supposed to dock? What’s going on?'' Suddenly, a familiar face appeared next to Matt Black, giving him money and shaking hands. I had to admit that ghostliness suited my father, but I couldn’t believe my bad luck.

I suppose it could’ve been worse. They weren’t as angry as I’d thought they’d be. I was stuck there, for who knew how long. I was grounded (big surprise), but I refused to live there forever. If they thought they could hold me back, or stop me, they were dead wrong. I had connections, now—I had people. And aliens. Ratri was out there somewhere. I even had Matt Black’s alien—a quirky thing, Quinzee, and I didn’t know how he ended up with me, but he was cheering me on nonetheless. ''This time, I’ll plan better. I’ll wait till I have everything I need. I’ll show them patience! I’ll go when they least expect it. Maybe I don’t even need the Folly. We’ll see.'' I thought to myself.

A year earlier, I had been young, under-prepared, clueless. But this time, I knew exactly what could go wrong. From here on out, I wouldn’t stop until every being in the universe dreaded the coming of Pirate Swift.

= Cast of Characters =

Lucy Swift

Ratri Iolana

Ruanos

Tamar Flint

Edny Pachenga

Delinvir

Gorgeia Delphinus Leo Tetrarchies-Smith

Prasti Centra

Mulligan McInvernesshireling

Nigel Amaxaroo

Nicholas Worthington

Jackson Devonjer

Esmerelda Dringlebutom

Matt Black

Quinzee